Managing Your Boundaries at Work Video

Do you ever struggle to speak up for yourself? Or say "no"? Maybe you fear damaging relationships. Or letting people down.

You might think you're doing the right thing. But when you don't have strong boundaries, it can end up doing more harm than good. You may find that you've neglected your own responsibilities and needs and end up suffering as a result.

As hard as it is to set them, boundaries are important because they allow you to take control of your work and your personal wellbeing. There are four key stages to managing your boundaries.

First, analyze where your boundaries are. Ask yourself, "Do I tend to back down "and let others have their way?" "Do I take on too much extra work?" "Do I tend to brush things off "even if they upset me?" "Or, do I sometimes feel "that my needs aren't important?" If you answer "yes" to these questions then you'll likely benefit from setting some boundaries to protect yourself.

Think back to the last time you felt angry, upset, or embarrassed at work because your needs weren't met. What was it, that you were being denied at the time? What did you really want? Is it still something you need now? Once you've identified your needs, start to build your sense of self-worth by using positive affirmations. This could be something like, "It's okay to say no to that meeting, "because I have other work to do "that's more of a priority right now." Or, "I will not allow others to speak over me "because I deserve to have my voice heard." If it helps, write these down. Or practice saying them out loud so you won't forget them.

The next step is to turn your affirmations into clear, healthy boundaries. And to act on them. As you outline your boundaries, make sure that you still consider other people's needs. It wouldn't be appropriate to say you'll never take on any extra work, for example. Instead, a healthier boundary would be to take on extra tasks, only if you have the capacity and if it is relevant to your role.

Communicate your new boundaries to your colleagues and be assertive. This way they'll know that you're serious. And will be more likely to respect your wishes. Sticking with your new behaviors can be tricky and you might be tempted to go back to your old ways. But stay strong. If someone tests your boundaries, assertively remind them why it's important for you to have them. Then, work with your colleague to come up with a solution that works for both of you. It's okay to reassess your boundaries, and adapt them if you need to. Just don't give them up all together.

To learn more about how to manage your boundaries, read the article    that accompanies this video.